Many schools and districts practice a form of institutional gaslighting.

I talk about how the structure of schools, along with how the socioeconomic level of the parent determines how much influence a parent has on their child's IEP process.

Other factors such as parent participation are important, see this link for a research article (see link below), but parent's knowledge of the way institutions work in general are more satisfied with their experience in the IEP process. And a parent who has more knowledge of this are often more educated and affluent.

However, gaslighting appears in some form in most schools and districts, it's the nature the of beast, so to speak. Any time a group of people, in this case educators, feel threatened in some way, the natural impulse is to retreat or strike out.

I would argue that the potential consequences of complaints, due process filings and similar parent responses make some school staff feel constrained into non-participation in the IEP process. Generally, those staff members who are less educated about special education are generally more reluctant to participate fully. General education teachers are the group most reluctant to "make a mistake" in a meeting.

In this episode I talk about why some IEP meetings include open and honest discussions about issues, while others discourage parent participation, and what you can do if you are feeling gaslighted.

Here is a link to an article about the issue:
https://adayinourshoes.com/gaslighting/

And here is the link to the parent satisfaction article:
https://www.researchgate.net publication/321690929_Satisfaction_With_Individualized_Education_Programs_Among_Parents_of_Young_Children_With_ASD